public service announcement:

ms lauren lola from the town of chi has brought it to my attention that i'm missing some key elements from my blog. like midgets, sex and crippling diseases .. but not all at the same time. i refuse to add midgets to my blog, not because i hate them but because they're up their with clowns on my fright-o meter. i also refuse to add crippling diseases because i am a merciful man and would never wish, nor give (if i had the power to) crippling diseases to anyone.
but in an effort to please my audience (who knew i even had one!) i have agreed to add the sex as well as roller derby featuring scantily clad hollywood starlets and murders. but not just senseless murders, because i am a man of principle, and being a man of principle does not allow me to kill at random but only when it is necessary. so, that being said, i will be ending forrest whitaker and shemar moore sooner than later and i will kill random white folks. see i even added racism to the mix. i hope ms lauren lola from the town of chi, and all our viewers, appreciate our efforts to make this blog new, exciting and awe inspiring .. like vh1 celebreality.

thank you,
the management.

*attention: midgets, sexers, crippling diseasers, scantily clad hollywood starlet roller derbiers, murders, white people and the racially senstive. i kid. i joke. get over it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr. Gomez,

I welcome the changes to the blog... but I do take offense to not including midgets.

May I say midgets are great. You can point and laugh, dress 'em up in tee shirts thats say "I'm with stupid" and pinch their cheeks as if they're perpetual children.
Besides, how can you say such things about them, when you're such good friends with Don?

I say bring on some roller derby midgets... scantily clad. Indeed.

And yes, please knock of Shemar Moore first.

Thank you kindly.

Ms. Amp. Jones-Johnson.

*and like mr.gomez, i joke. i kid. you can hate me now...*